Conservative / God / Marriage / Politics / socialism

I Am Your Warning: My Socialist Life

communist-flag1While people are up in arms about the impending socialism starting to take over our country and while it is some foreign abstract concept for them, it is my reality. I know all too well what happens when government runs your life. What you have to give up, what dreams you deny. My life started out normal enough. I was born to a drug addicted mother and was put up for adoption. I was given to the Leichnitzes. They were a loving family with three children of their own and yet they had enough love for me to take me in and make me their own. Like many children of my time, they divorced and when I was fourteen my father was killed by a drunk driver. And so began my long journey into freedom denied, into a life I would never escape. denaleichnitzamos

I attempted suicide because the grief of losing my dad was too much and I was immediately locked up. I would not get out until I was 21 years old. I was put into juvenile placements while my father’s murderer walked around a free man. I was doing his time! I was told when to get up, go to bed, when to eat. I was a teenage girl and should’ve been going to dances and dating but of course any contact with the opposite sex was strictly forbidden. I was watched 24 hours a day when I walked in that place with my vomit stained nightshirt from the suicide attempt (I had overdosed on my seizure medication), even when going to the bathroom or showering, I had to be watched. I was not allowed passes to see my family because my insurance wouldn’t pay for it. So on special occasions they would write a pass for me anyway and tear it up when I got back. I have been restrained, given medication to sedate me and put into a “seclusion room” which is just a rubber room. I have had six men restrain me (even at 122 pounds I was a strong and rambunctious girl) and I have been talked to death in therapy. I have had rooms with a private bath and have had to shower with a gang of girls. I have slept on hard metal beds all in a row and eaten food you wouldn’t feed to dog. I have seen the boy I love been taken away in shackles3chains and shackles like he was a wild animal. He was taken to CYA (California Youth Authority, which is prison for kids) while I stood there crying. He cried too. I have seen people drug by their hair and bruises on their arms from getting too much Thorazine. I lost my adolescence because the state knew better.

During these years I created my own family since mine was being weddings1denied to me. The boy who was taken away was my “husband” and we had two “daughters.” I loved those girls and whenever they needed someone to talk to I was there. You can’t deny the need for family because it is just too ingrained. And if we couldn’t have our Moms and Dads well we would just have to be them for ourselves. I have been a “little sister” and a “big sister” and I have had more surrogate mothers than I can shake a stick at. This is how the state “raises” its young. Be afraid, be very afraid.

medicationsAs an adult I grew up and I was finally able to get myself on SSI. I needed that because they would pay for my meds. However that meant, never making enough to be self-reliant for if I did I could lose my Medi-Cal and that meant paying for my own meds which were terribly expensive. Still I have worked. I worked for LAUSD, where I wasn’t allowed to work full time because they didn’t want to give Instructional Aides any benefits. We paid union dues to the teacher’s union but never once got any benefit for them. I worked for LAUSD for four years. I did all the work of the teacher but never got paid like one. I have worked for places like Beyond Shelter and Shelter Partnership, which helped the homeless. I have done receptionist work, data entry and have even gotten paid to write. But always I made sure to stay below the radar. I needed those meds. So what did I give up to make sure I had my meds-a husband. I fell in love with a great man when I was 21. We wanted to get married but it meant each of us losing half our benefits. We were already living hand to mouth, we couldn’t afford to live on just one check. So we had a “holy union.” We ended up breaking up four years later. Once a year I get letters from the government asking about income status and changes in family status. Each letter strikes fear in my heart. Will they deny me? I had been denied once. Maybe they will do it again? What will happen if they do? I am going back to school so I can be self-reliant. Before I didn’t have God, now I do. I know he will provide for me. He always has.

But this is your life on socialism people. It is a life that is not yours. A life where any control you have is limited. It is a life where other people call the shots and not only do you obey, you thank them for it. It is a life where decisions like who to marry and when are taken from you. It is a life of emptiness. It is a life without fathers, a life without husbands, and a life without families. It is a life of lies. Lies like “I don’t need a man.” Lies like, “Only suckers work.” It is a life so far removed from God and anything righteous that you wonder if He can even see you. Does he know how badly you want your own life back? Does He know how badly you need your dignity? This is your warning. I am fighting against socialism because I have lived it. It is not some concept I heard about in an economics class. It is not something I read about in a history book. I have lived it and I have realized I deserve better. So I am going to work towards being the best person I can be and I can’t do that in my socialistic existence. I must rise above it! I must achieve greatness because my son needs to know whatever he sets his mind to adonaiatrallyhe can achieve and I am going to be that example for him! So while many of you are fighting against welfare, taxes and for more money. I am fighting for liberty! I am fighting for my right to exist! And while I thank the American taxpayer for saving my hide on more than one occasion, I must make my own way. I am forever indebted to the generous and benevolent taxpayer but I will always despise the government that took so much from me. You have been forewarned. Now go out and fight for the liberty of all your brothers and sisters stuck in this socialistic nightmare.

15 thoughts on “I Am Your Warning: My Socialist Life

  1. I think that most of us who have come out of the drunkenness of governmental bondage appreciate the principles of conservatism and what blessings it brings. Deuteronomy 30:19, tells us to chose life, a life lived through faith in God not man and not man’s government. God is the Creator of life and knows how to control and navigate it. The Bible also says we can not serve both God and man, for we will love the one and hate the other, (my words). Man can not perfect what God has ordained. I too had once been in chains to the government, as a single mom of 4 little children, left in a city where I knew no one, I had no other choice but to seek the assistance of the government. But then I looked at those four children and thought, they deserved better, they are not going to be statistics and so I went back to school to obtain a degree. The government did everything they could to prevent me from getting out of their clutches, but thanks be to God I did and on May 18, 1996, I received my degree and a ticket to the promises God had in store for me, since that time I have seen Him do amazing things and He has even more to do. One thing about the black consevative is that they can see, they can understand that there is more to life than receiving a handout. The get to taste what is means to succeed instead of live in shackles and that is what many don’t understand. They don’t appreciate freedom and the ability to succeed. But they will just as we have. Keep on reaching higher, because as Philippians 4:13 says, we can do all things, through Christ Jesus who strengthens us, it is not through the government, or any other man, but through Christ.

  2. I love what you wrote Mary, but I am bewildered by what you meant by “the black conservative”? Is this racially implied? because if it is, I have to say I am a bit stooped, because I don’t think this has anything to do with being white, black, hispanic or whatever. I am white, bet yet I can relate to some of the things she has written and more power and glory to her, because she and many other’s deserve it and if this is not what you meant, my apologies because we are writing these things down and sometimes they can be percieved in very different ways than what the author had meant.

  3. Hello True Patriot, I cannot and will not speak for Mary but I will tell you what I took from her words, she is talking specifically about Black conservatives because Blacks in general have been so skillfully duped in accepting government handouts without looking at the cost to our lives, our children’s lives and to society as a whole. While conservatives of all colors espouse these principles Blacks have been slower in accepting the truth of them. The need to reach out and create more Black conservatives is imperative and we cannot wait for others to do so. You are right conservatism has nothing to do with skin color and everything with heart and your natural fortitude and that transcends ethnicity.

    However, being a Black conservative can be daunting at times because it can feel like you are all alone at there, read “The Rise of Black Conservatives” on here and you will start to understand the opposition we face. I think her message was meant to assure us we are not alone and we do have it in our power to change our circumstances, something liberals don’t like to promote because it removes us from their clutches. At least that is how I read it to mean. God bless you True Patriot, all of us, of all colors, all religions, all socio economic background have to fight the great tyranny that is coming upon our land. We either hang together or we hang separately. I think Ben Franklin said that and it is definitely true today.

  4. Hello True Patriot, I cannot and will not speak for Mary but I will tell you what I took from her words, she is talking specifically about Black conservatives because Blacks in general have been so skillfully duped in accepting government handouts without looking at the cost to our lives, our children’s lives and to society as a whole. While conservatives of all colors espouse these principles Blacks have been slower in accepting the truth of them. The need to reach out and create more Black conservatives is imperative and we cannot wait for others to do so. You are right conservatism has nothing to do with skin color and everything with heart and your natural fortitude and that transcends ethnicity.

    However, being a Black conservative can be daunting at times because it can feel like you are all alone at there, read “The Rise of Black Conservatives” on here and you will start to understand the opposition we face. I think her message was meant to assure us we are not alone and we do have it in our power to change our circumstances, something liberals don’t like to promote because it removes us from their clutches. At least that is how I read it to mean. God bless you True Patriot, all of us, of all colors, all religions, all socio economic background have to fight the great tyranny that is coming upon our land. We either hang together or we hang separately. I think Ben Franklin said that and it is definitely true today.

  5. I am inspired . I am a conservative white boy in Louisiana and I don’t know any conservative black people there seems to be a great rift between black and white people here. I lived out of the south for several years and the lines between races was alot less visible. I was young back then and didn’t talk about principles and values with my friends, we mostly talked about girls and drinking, but I had Hispanic and Asian and Black friends. Then I went home and it is not the case. I’ve tried several times to invite people of different ethnic backgrounds to go out and do things and was met with polite excuses. I went to the teaparty in my home town of Alexandria and
    Ii did not see any ethnicities other than white in attendance and this saddens me because we can only truly be free when we are willing to work together.

  6. More power to you Dena! We do not all come into this life on equal ground, but we are all loved by God and can rise above our circumstances. The great thing about the United States is that there are so many opportunities here that we can seize to help us improve our lots. I can only imagine how much courage, fortitude and integrity you have to do what you are doing. Continue your education…you will be blessed for it, and reap great benefits from it. And continue speaking out against socialism!

  7. Right on the mark young lady! Thanks for speaking out about your experiences. We all, white, black, brown and yellow need to seek true freedom and shake off the chains that socialist and corrupt goverment keeps trying to make stronger. May God bless your endevours to have a better life.

  8. Hi Dena:
    I hear all that you are saying and I have very strong feelings about it. Though I have not been a victim of such ugliness, I have witnessed it happen to many kids. I live next to a group home and I think it is the worse way that a child could be reared. As you stated they have no true freedoms and they do not live a normal life contrary to what they are told. As you said, the opposite sex is out of the question, and never mind that they are teenagers, they cannot venture pass the front yard and when they are in the front yard they are constantly being watched like toddlers. I have watched and have made friends with lots of the kids, if only to give them some kind of connection to normal life. I find that I love these kids and care so much that it made me too upset to witness and so decided not to get involved.

    At any rate Dena, my reason for writing was to say that I am not a conservative nor a liberal just a human being and I don’t think that all that happened to you happened under the watch of Mr. Obama and nor do I think that it all happened under the watch of the so called liberals. As a matter of fact a lot of that time was under the watch of conservatives. I don’t say this to make an argument for liberals nor socialism, I say it to argue that it doesn’t matter what party, race nor sex someone is, evil is evil and even a liberal can pretend to be a conservative and vice versa. We have got to fight the evil, not the distorted faces put upon it. I don’t know if what Mr. Obama is proposing is the right or wrong thing and I do pray it is right, but so far nothing else has been right either. Go forth Dena, tell your story… it needs to be told for all the children of the world without a voice, but don’t limit the responsibilities of the evil visited upon them on one group of people. Let the children have a broader mind than that… in order to find all the ways and places to fight this wickedness. If they are told that there is only one place to look, some will only look there, don’t put them in another cage. Besides Deana, isn’t this just another way to seperate ourselves and another way for evil to divide and conquor? Take care Deana, more power and blessings to you and let’s pray that what Mr. Obama is perhaps proposing isn’t socialism but just another and perhaps better way for everybody.

  9. Dear Terry,
    I hope you will change your mind about getting involved. It must be extremely hard to watch what they are going through but think about how much harder it is for them. It is worth it in the long run because you may be able to turn their life around and wouldn’t that be a terrific legacy to leave when you depart this Earth?

    Next, you are right we must fight evil wherever it comes from and it is not relegated just to Democrats or liberals. However, I am talking strictly socialism here. What I painted in this story of my life was a life of socialism. Yes, it didn’t happen under Obama but Obama wants this kind of life for everyone. He wants to take away our freedom to believe in God and replace him with Allah. He wants to have total control over the private sector and have them report to him directly. He wants Israel to submit to the Palenstinians and has turned his back on our only ally in that region. He is a very dangerous man and nothing he has done yet has shown he has America’s best interest at heart. While I commend you for giving him the benefit of the doubt, he has already shown himself to be an enemy of the American people and he is issuing in a way of life that is going to mean death to America and I just can’t let that happen. I will keep you in my prayers because you are obviously a good person with a good heart and I wish you the best in your life.

    Thank all of you for your kind words and I hope I can live up to the promise all of you hold out for me. God bless each and every one of you.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s